A year come and gone (non-tri related)

This has nothing to do with tri. I am just thinking about my own self development over the year.

I am leading the Young Career Fellowship in my Church. I have been in this position for a year. I can't really say I lead.

There is a lot of reason why I don't feel like I am leading....one of them is that I am a young Christian. This reason trapped me into a year. My mind screams out, 'how are you going to lead them..you are so young..so new...'

I can see this as a challenge. I, instead, took the easy route. The very reason became an excuse...I can't lead b/c I am too young...Be lassez-faire. Just see how things go. Very little in planning and organization. (side note: Does training effected this? For sure....).

If there is one thing about God is that He is mighty. My fellowship continued to grow despite my lack of guidance, vision and leadership. Last November, avg attendance was 8. Now, 15+. We once have 20 people. One person baptized and one recently accepted Christ.

Last night, we once again sat down and chat about what we want from the group. I am glad a few members were willing to step up and decide to form a committee.

...If there is a problem...or something that need to be change, it is my attitude...my perspective. A year has come and gone. And things haven't change much. I know things need to be change so I need to take the initiative and make the change. As a leader, that's my job. Might stumble a few times but that's the only way to grow. No one learn to ride a bike without falling down.

If I don't take that step, I can't expect my group to do the same. Yet, deep in my mind, I have been waiting for them to take the leap. Leader goes first...they always go first.

It is time to stop saying 'I can't lead or I can't b/c I don't know or no formal training ' Either I find a way or make one. Fear, you have stop me once and in the future I know I will see you again. Come, let's go for a ride....

Our Deepest Fear

By Marianne Williamson

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness
That most frightens us.

We ask ourselves
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.

Your playing small
Does not serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking
So that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine,
As children do.
We were born to make manifest
The glory of God that is within us.

It's not just in some of us;
It's in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine,
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we're liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.